Music: Mad Caddies - No Hope

Feeling: Finally Free

He told me that I needed to live life for ME, not for anyone else. I've always tried to live for other people, but when I make a move to live for myself, the people that I have been living for get upset with me. No more living for anyone else. It's all ME baby, no one else. He also told me that I need life experience, and sometimes I just need to say 'Fuck it' and just do it. I'm just going to do it from now on.

Just a little insight on my uncle. He's one of the most important people in my life. He has AIDS. You guys know the fad that is going on right now with the rubber bracelets? I donated money to the AIDS foundation and I wear a red bracelet to show that I support the research for a cure. Anyways, in our talk, he says to me, 'I'm living this' while he points to my bracelet. I almost broke down in tears. He said, if he could have done things differently in his life when he was my age, he would have. He told me that sometimes you just have to take an opportunity, a chance, and just run with it.

My life will be changing within six months from now. I'm making plans to change my life. I don't have any real life experience. I want to experience life. I've lived in Florida for the past 23, almost 24 years. The only moving I have done, is from one coast of Florida to the other. You only live once, and you never know when the end is. The end for me, you or anyone else could be tomorrow.

I'm sure that when I reveal my life changing plan to people, they will be upset with me. They will say that I'm running, that I'm stupid for making this decision. I'm not running, and I'm not stupid, I'm only 23 years old, and time for experience is running short.

To my friends that read this, you will never lose my friendship, no matter what happens. I will always be there for the ones I love, and the ones I care for. No matter how far away I am. To those that doubt this, I'm sorry you feel this way. Friends should be supportive of eachother in whatever they do. If the support is not there, then were they really my friends to begin with?

My mom supports the decision I have made. She's the one that has been telling me to do this for a long time now. I've been wanting this for a long time, and it's about time that I get over my fear, and just do it. To my mother, I love you. Thank you for being supportive.

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